We appointed a PEM confinement lady #899 Jackie based on Facebook since the one that all my friends used weren't available. Lets just say that it was terrible and I called PEM on the 4th day and sent her home on the 5th day.
She was here the second day I was discharged, before Jaime was home. First day was fine, she cooked and familiarized herself with our place. The husband also brought her grocery shopping and bought a stool that she chose to bathe Jaime. I told her that I wanted breakfast to be ready at 8am, lunch around 12 plus and dinner around 7pm. She didn't need to do night shift as I've decided to take care of Jaime at night. She just had to help to cook and wash/sterilize all my pump parts and bottles for me. We were generally easy-going people really, and I didn't even need her to boil herbs for bathing nor cook red dates tea since I don't drink it. Even meals were quite simple as we didn't mind a meat, a vegetable and a soup. Soups were all clearly labelled by days and all she needed to do was to throw it into the pot to boil. She has been resting by 10pm till past 7am and breakfast was only ready by 8am the first day - an egg sandwich with cheese in a plastic bag that I ate while I pumped milk. My breakfast got later and later, and by the 4th day, I didn't even finish breakfast before my massage lady came at 9am.
I wrote in to PEM officially after I requested for her termination:
Some main complaints I have of the nanny:
1. She refuses to feed my baby when she fuss and cry, because '3 hour is not up yet'. We have told her repeatedly that if she shows signs of rooting i.e. Starting to cry and stick her tongue out etc, she should start to prepare the feed. My baby is fully breastfed and sometimes drinks 1-2hourly due to day 5-7 grow spurt. She takes her time to prepare her feed only after my baby cries loudly. By the time feed is ready, my baby is crying hysterically and hungry, gulping her milk and end up regurgitating afterwards. This becomes a vicious cycle as she did not manage to digest the milk and will need to feed again in the next hour or two.
2. She does not like to wash too many bottles and pump parts. As I exclusively pump my breastmilk, I need her to wash/sterilize the bottles and pump parts every 2-3 hours. She kept making comments that I'm pumping too often, that it's not 3 hours yet. She also suggested that I re-use my pump parts by placing it in the fridge. This is against guidelines and not hygienic, especially for a newborn. She also kept away my extra bottles saying that there are 'too many' and I end up having to wash them at night after pumping as I've ran out of bottles - while she slept!
3. We communicated that breakfast should be ready by 8am daily as my massage lady comes at 9am. She only makes sandwiches for me, which was ready on the first morning. However, my breakfast was late from 3rd day onwards and I had to start my massage without finishing breakfast on the 4th day. On the 5th day, my tuna sandwich was only ready 840am and came in a bowl of tuna from a can and the loaf of bread on table - she did not even bother to put the tuna on bread for me and expect me to diy the sandwich while she herself made 3 slices of golden brown french toast for herself.
4. She leaves my baby unattended constantly, even on a high changing table when she left to prepare her bath. This is extremely dangerous as she's kicking and there's nothing to stop her from rolling down. During the afternoon, she also leaves baby unattended for extended period of time as she takes a long bath with a face massage.
5. She rest in the afternoon although and shows zero initiative although she rests before 10pm and only wake up at 7am! When I was out for gynae visit and my mum was resting at my place, she told my siblings (18yo sister and 28yo brother with zero experience of babysitting) to take care of my baby while she rest in the room with closed door - call her if needed. She should be responsible for my baby instead of expecting my siblings to take care of her while I'm out!
There are other small things which I do not agree with, but the above made it impossible to keep her for the well-being of my child. We communicated the first reason as the main reason for her dismissal but she said that her training taught her to feed every 3 hourly and she was afraid that my baby is over-fed. This does not make sense as baby drinks about 60-70ml 3 hourly but only drinks 20-40ml when she drinks in an hour or two. She also went with us to the pd and told her that baby should be fed on demand and should not be left to cry.
To be fair, she did keep my kitchen clean and cooked a meat, a vegetable and a soup dish for lunch and dinner. However, I hope that no other mummy have to go through this as she's obviously complacent and lazy. I also hope that no other mummies have to pay her and ask her to leave early or pay her the extra $200 for a few days' worth of work.
I also found other recent reviews in August of her on Facebook:
This was my breakfast on the 5th day - a bowl of tuna, with the loaf of bread on the table only ready by 840am though I told her to prepare breakfast by 8am (in time for my 9am massage). I'm not sure if I'm supposed to give explicit instructions for her to 'kiap' my sandwich before serving, but she made 3 slices crispy golden-brown french toast for herself.
I seriously think that she has zero heart to work and really out to eat us as young first-time-parents. She has it so good as a confinement lady with us, yet she doesn't even bother to make the effort. I didn't have high expectations from her, but I really couldn't take her laziness and complacency! I suppose she didn't expect to be replaced so quickly.
My replacement confinement lady was supposed to come on Monday 2-5pm, but PEM called me on Monday morning after reading my feedback above. They offered me a refund of the $700 deposit if I chose not to have the replacement nanny. However, if I chose to take the replacement who will arrive at my doorstep in few hours, the offer for refund is no longer valid and I will have to complete the full 28 days even if I'm not satisfied with the nanny. I only have one more chance for replacement and they will not make any refund after this final offer since I complained that the nanny 'does not take any initiative.
After the unpleasant experience with the first confinement lady, the thought of having to put up with a terrible nanny at home was really repulsive Can't imagine having to put up with this and still have to pay like $2k without any possibility of refund. I also felt that PEM was not confident that their nanny will meet my expectations since they would rather pay me back my deposit (without me requesting for it). They told me on the phone that they will offer me the refund since I feedback that 'my nanny did not take any initiative' - which was a strange reason to offer a refund instead of going ahead with a better replacement based on my feedback instead. Also, if they were really sincere, they would have let me try out the replacement nanny and refund me only if she was still not up to standard! It felt that they wanted to refund me and get out of it to avoid any more complaints or bad feedback from me. By the way, their Facebook reviews are highly controlled, only good feedback are found on their page. I also heard that nannies are asked to get good Facebook feedback, otherwise they will get $200 less - not sure if this was true. Some nannies also said that PEM took a big cut and it's getting worst after the sons took over, so many good nannies have already left.
So I accepted the refund and went without a confinement lady - not that the first one did much in the first place. Before that, I was all for a confinement lady, but after this experience, I'm not sure if I'll get one the next time. $2k plus is alot of money, and if you happen to get a lousy confinement nanny (which is not that rare), it's really depressing.
I'm totally not impressed with how PEM handled this, and seriously wonder why would they have offered me a refund when the replacement nanny was already scheduled to arrive at my doorstep in few hours (she should already be on her way if from Malaysia). What did they do with that confinement lady who was supposedly already on the way? Oh, and I only received notification for work permit of the first nanny, nothing for the replacement nanny.
I have to say that there were many good nannies from PEM that my mummy friends had too, I guess it's down to luck and there's no guarantee when it comes to confinement ladies despite the hefty price-tag. If possible, word-of-mouth is still ideal though even the same nanny may have different standards when it comes to different customers.
She was here the second day I was discharged, before Jaime was home. First day was fine, she cooked and familiarized herself with our place. The husband also brought her grocery shopping and bought a stool that she chose to bathe Jaime. I told her that I wanted breakfast to be ready at 8am, lunch around 12 plus and dinner around 7pm. She didn't need to do night shift as I've decided to take care of Jaime at night. She just had to help to cook and wash/sterilize all my pump parts and bottles for me. We were generally easy-going people really, and I didn't even need her to boil herbs for bathing nor cook red dates tea since I don't drink it. Even meals were quite simple as we didn't mind a meat, a vegetable and a soup. Soups were all clearly labelled by days and all she needed to do was to throw it into the pot to boil. She has been resting by 10pm till past 7am and breakfast was only ready by 8am the first day - an egg sandwich with cheese in a plastic bag that I ate while I pumped milk. My breakfast got later and later, and by the 4th day, I didn't even finish breakfast before my massage lady came at 9am.
I wrote in to PEM officially after I requested for her termination:
Some main complaints I have of the nanny:
1. She refuses to feed my baby when she fuss and cry, because '3 hour is not up yet'. We have told her repeatedly that if she shows signs of rooting i.e. Starting to cry and stick her tongue out etc, she should start to prepare the feed. My baby is fully breastfed and sometimes drinks 1-2hourly due to day 5-7 grow spurt. She takes her time to prepare her feed only after my baby cries loudly. By the time feed is ready, my baby is crying hysterically and hungry, gulping her milk and end up regurgitating afterwards. This becomes a vicious cycle as she did not manage to digest the milk and will need to feed again in the next hour or two.
2. She does not like to wash too many bottles and pump parts. As I exclusively pump my breastmilk, I need her to wash/sterilize the bottles and pump parts every 2-3 hours. She kept making comments that I'm pumping too often, that it's not 3 hours yet. She also suggested that I re-use my pump parts by placing it in the fridge. This is against guidelines and not hygienic, especially for a newborn. She also kept away my extra bottles saying that there are 'too many' and I end up having to wash them at night after pumping as I've ran out of bottles - while she slept!
3. We communicated that breakfast should be ready by 8am daily as my massage lady comes at 9am. She only makes sandwiches for me, which was ready on the first morning. However, my breakfast was late from 3rd day onwards and I had to start my massage without finishing breakfast on the 4th day. On the 5th day, my tuna sandwich was only ready 840am and came in a bowl of tuna from a can and the loaf of bread on table - she did not even bother to put the tuna on bread for me and expect me to diy the sandwich while she herself made 3 slices of golden brown french toast for herself.
4. She leaves my baby unattended constantly, even on a high changing table when she left to prepare her bath. This is extremely dangerous as she's kicking and there's nothing to stop her from rolling down. During the afternoon, she also leaves baby unattended for extended period of time as she takes a long bath with a face massage.
5. She rest in the afternoon although and shows zero initiative although she rests before 10pm and only wake up at 7am! When I was out for gynae visit and my mum was resting at my place, she told my siblings (18yo sister and 28yo brother with zero experience of babysitting) to take care of my baby while she rest in the room with closed door - call her if needed. She should be responsible for my baby instead of expecting my siblings to take care of her while I'm out!
There are other small things which I do not agree with, but the above made it impossible to keep her for the well-being of my child. We communicated the first reason as the main reason for her dismissal but she said that her training taught her to feed every 3 hourly and she was afraid that my baby is over-fed. This does not make sense as baby drinks about 60-70ml 3 hourly but only drinks 20-40ml when she drinks in an hour or two. She also went with us to the pd and told her that baby should be fed on demand and should not be left to cry.
To be fair, she did keep my kitchen clean and cooked a meat, a vegetable and a soup dish for lunch and dinner. However, I hope that no other mummy have to go through this as she's obviously complacent and lazy. I also hope that no other mummies have to pay her and ask her to leave early or pay her the extra $200 for a few days' worth of work.
I also found other recent reviews in August of her on Facebook:
This was my breakfast on the 5th day - a bowl of tuna, with the loaf of bread on the table only ready by 840am though I told her to prepare breakfast by 8am (in time for my 9am massage). I'm not sure if I'm supposed to give explicit instructions for her to 'kiap' my sandwich before serving, but she made 3 slices crispy golden-brown french toast for herself.
I seriously think that she has zero heart to work and really out to eat us as young first-time-parents. She has it so good as a confinement lady with us, yet she doesn't even bother to make the effort. I didn't have high expectations from her, but I really couldn't take her laziness and complacency! I suppose she didn't expect to be replaced so quickly.
My replacement confinement lady was supposed to come on Monday 2-5pm, but PEM called me on Monday morning after reading my feedback above. They offered me a refund of the $700 deposit if I chose not to have the replacement nanny. However, if I chose to take the replacement who will arrive at my doorstep in few hours, the offer for refund is no longer valid and I will have to complete the full 28 days even if I'm not satisfied with the nanny. I only have one more chance for replacement and they will not make any refund after this final offer since I complained that the nanny 'does not take any initiative.
After the unpleasant experience with the first confinement lady, the thought of having to put up with a terrible nanny at home was really repulsive Can't imagine having to put up with this and still have to pay like $2k without any possibility of refund. I also felt that PEM was not confident that their nanny will meet my expectations since they would rather pay me back my deposit (without me requesting for it). They told me on the phone that they will offer me the refund since I feedback that 'my nanny did not take any initiative' - which was a strange reason to offer a refund instead of going ahead with a better replacement based on my feedback instead. Also, if they were really sincere, they would have let me try out the replacement nanny and refund me only if she was still not up to standard! It felt that they wanted to refund me and get out of it to avoid any more complaints or bad feedback from me. By the way, their Facebook reviews are highly controlled, only good feedback are found on their page. I also heard that nannies are asked to get good Facebook feedback, otherwise they will get $200 less - not sure if this was true. Some nannies also said that PEM took a big cut and it's getting worst after the sons took over, so many good nannies have already left.
So I accepted the refund and went without a confinement lady - not that the first one did much in the first place. Before that, I was all for a confinement lady, but after this experience, I'm not sure if I'll get one the next time. $2k plus is alot of money, and if you happen to get a lousy confinement nanny (which is not that rare), it's really depressing.
I'm totally not impressed with how PEM handled this, and seriously wonder why would they have offered me a refund when the replacement nanny was already scheduled to arrive at my doorstep in few hours (she should already be on her way if from Malaysia). What did they do with that confinement lady who was supposedly already on the way? Oh, and I only received notification for work permit of the first nanny, nothing for the replacement nanny.
I have to say that there were many good nannies from PEM that my mummy friends had too, I guess it's down to luck and there's no guarantee when it comes to confinement ladies despite the hefty price-tag. If possible, word-of-mouth is still ideal though even the same nanny may have different standards when it comes to different customers.
I have to second JooJoo 922's comment. I also engaged Jackie before and have absolutely no problems with her. I even extended her contract. Jackie has been a pillar of support throughout my confinement and she takes care of me, my baby, and my family very well. She is very clean and meticulous and takes very good care of the baby. She looks after the baby at night to ensure that I can rest well. Jackie also takes my feedback to her seriously, although there is very little need to. Her meals are simple but delicious.
ReplyDeleteIndividual experience may differ due to circumstances. Just thought I should comment to give a more balanced view.
Thank you for sharing. I'm not seeing Joo's comment. When did you get her? I also got her from the positive sharing I found on FB. Unfortunately, this was my experience and I really just wanted someone to help with cooking and helping out as I intended to be as hands on as possible.
DeleteSometimes, people become complacent or have inconsistent performance depending on who they work with. This wasn't uncommon from what I heard from friends who shared CL contacts. In this digital age, moms can now share their experiences and make their own informed choices.
** Happened to discovered my post post was deleted, so I am reposting it to help mamas who needs more info. Please don get me wrong, I m not here to attack but I felt it is unfair and I do agree all moms can share their experiences and make their own informed choices.
DeleteI happened to see this post and realized that #899 Jackie is actually the nanny that I have engaged previously. I am so sorry that you have been through this. But please allow me to share my experience. It was a total different experience to me.
She really loves my baby a lot. She sings to him to calm him down all the times when he cries.
Me and her shared a room with my baby and she asked me to go back to sleep when baby woke up in the middle of the night cuz she attended to him.
She reminded us once and again to always wash baby’s buttock after he poops in order to protect his tender skin.
In terms of my food, she doesn’t only cook mine but my husband’s share when she was with me. She was not lazy at all.
She asked me what food gives me appetite when I have no appetite due to the very bad wound infection I was going through. She even called back to PEM to seek professional advises on whether I can eat some food due to my wound infection.
I couldn’t really sit to breastfeed my baby because it pressed on my wound and she taught me how I can lie on the side to latch my baby. She was so professional and helpful that she was almost like a lactation consultant.
She did removed some of my bottles from the sterilizer but she explained to me that by having too many bottles inside, it blocked the steam from coming out which will in the end affect the sterilization of all the bottles inside. This make total sense to me.
She washes baby’s bottle immediately to avoid milk built-ups even in the middle of the night.
My baby had colic and she massages him everyday. She teaches us how to help baby feel better too.
In terms of baby milk, I agree with feeding on demand. But I also think it is important not to overfeed... it can lead to very serious consequence... it can leads to baby’s intestine and digestion problem, breathing difficulty etc. I once heard of stories that baby was overfed, vomited, choked and turn purple. I am sure the nanny is doing her part to ensure the baby’s wellness. I don’t think any nanny will be silly enough to intentionally hold baby’s milk, knowing this will make parents very unhappy and ended up being complained.
Before she left, she attentively guided us every step in bathing baby, cleaning baby, how to carry baby in order to calm him down and help him feel comfortable etc.
Please don’t get me wrong that I am here to attack you or judge you. I am sure you felt extremely bad and I truly sympathize that. But I believe there could be some misunderstanding hence I feel justice needs to be sounded out especially when there is only a side of a story. We all know there is no way these nanny can come online to explain themselves, it makes it even more unfair for people who are educated and IT savvy like us to become a keyboard warrior coming here attacking them - they, people who can’t even fight back through a simple explanation.
To everyone who is reading this, I hope and believe you are discerning enough to not to jump into conclusion in whatever you see in this world of online platform. I think we are all no judge to anyone nor any situation. We have all heard such idiom before “if 10 says that you are good, but merely 1 says that you are bad, does that makes you a bad person generally?”. We all hate to be judged, so let us not do so to make the world a better place.
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